MEN: THERE IS HOPE FOR ME........maybe?

The Story of Girl that Gets Hit on at the Ralph's Deli Counter...by a ghetto fabulous salvation army bell ringer. (this doesn't even do justice)

Ok. Just got home from getting my haircolored, getting a pedi and buying groceries at Ralph's. And have I got a wonderful entry for ALL OF YOU. Today, my trip reknewed my faith in the possibility that men just might be interested in me......but, of course, I didn't mention what kind of men!

So I got to Ralph's today after getting my hair-colored in the Valley (for the newline xmas party tonight, yay! I'm Tin's +1!) and getting a pedicure. Here I am, in my wonderfully flat-ironed hair with amazing pedicure, strolling thru Ralphs buying the likes of water, salmon, frozen chicken and top sirloin.... I suddenly have the urge to get a Grilled Focaccia Panini from the great deli counter since I've been eyein' one for days.....so I push the cart on over and grab a number and waiting patiently among a handful of men waiting to get a sandwich. La-di-da... I patiently survey the scene...there's a tall white man getting his sandwich made, a tall light-skinned black man waiting, and a black Salvation Army Bell Ringer (description: 5'7", curly hair under a cap, kinda dishelved, raspy voice, not my kinda guy) who grabbed the previous number ahead of me and a bunch of friendly-looking deli associates catering to our sandwich needs.... SABR (salvation army bell ringer) comes up behind me and says:

SABR: Hey..how ya doin'?
(Being the kind person I am I respond. My biggest mistake...looking back)
Me: Great! Thanks and you?
SABR: I'm doin' good.
Me: That's good. (I smile and await my # in line)
Deli Associate calls SABR's number and he orders 2-pieces of fried chicken. And I'm hoping conversation with SABR has commenced.
SABR: My guess is that you have a boyfriend??
Me: (thinking... uhhh...oh no... must lie....) Yeah, I do. (sympathy smile)
SABR: Awee, well you must have some single friends?
Me: (thinking...oh shit, great, what did I just get myself into?) Mmm.. I have some of each.
SABR: Well lemme tell you, how bout I give you my number to give to your friends and you have them call me. Do me that favor?
Me: Kinda like a gift that keeps on giving?
SABR: Yeah, just like that.
Me: (nods, speechless)
Deli Associates asks what I want... I order...hoping SABR won't actually give me his 7-Digits...I look over to my left, and he is kneeling on the ground ripping a piece of paper off and scribblin'.
SABR: Here ya go. (passes me the scrap of paper) Lemme say this, your friends would be doing themselves a diservice if they don't call me, so have them call me?
Me: I'll try! (smile)
SABR walks off
Me: (i breathe a sigh of relief and look over to my left and the other black man in line is smirking and I am blushing out of embarassment.. he says, "what was that fool doin'?!?!?" I respond, "You try to be nice..and look where it gets you....!" He goes, "Yeah, I know how that is...hahah"..me continuing to be embarassed, black man continues laughing, and I look up and see DELI ASSOCIATE MAN smirking. I go, "You heard that going down too?" Black Man: "Yeah he did, he was right across the street there!" Other Deli Associate Woman who helped me with my order won't stop smiling and laughing either.

So this was my embarassing-WEIRD experience of the day.. in the DELI line @ a RALPH'S nonetheless. WTF?! SABR was total g-fabulous and not-my-type, he attempts to hit on me and then indirectly my friends, offers me his phone number, I have an audience watching all of this, I have audience commentary and a well-amused audience. LASLTY, I will forever be THEIR STORY TO TELL ABOUT THE GIRL WHO GOT HIT ON IN LINE @ THE DELI COUNTER BY A foolish SALVATION ARMY BELL RINGER!!!!

Let's re-cap why the above DELI DATING situation might have happened this afternoon:
A. The freshly chemically-colored hair
B. The freshly french pedicured toes
C. I give off endorphines that attract only g-fabulous Bell Ringers who like 2-pieces of chicken from the Ralph's Deli Counter.
(all signs point to C.)
EDITED: or OPTION D thanks to nick: THE BOOOOTAY junk in the trunk.

I hope this entertained you a lil bit and gives you and I faith that, yes, there are men out there who find me the least bit...inviting enough. My self-esteem soars!